Leaning into the Wait

Last week I posted about change. My goodness, we love it and hate it all at the same time, but what happens when we are ready for things to change, but they're not. What do we do in the wait?

As I am trying my hardest not to rush this season of my life - it's fun and exciting, has its challenges, but comes with just-about-all a girl could wish for - yet there's still a part of me that is ready to move onto the next thing.

Have you been there? If I could only make it through this day. Or if only that sweet baby could talk or walk already. If only I could move into that new home or get married or have children, or get a new job, new car, new pay raise, or get to Friday, if only I could get a new ______ or to the next _____. If only.  

If only we didn't wish our life away.  

Waiting is part of life! Just as much as change is, so is waiting. 

When we start wishing ourselves to the next season (or even to the end of the week!), we begin missing things. We miss the joy. We miss moments and laughter or memories and lessons. We miss the opportunity that's only found in the "right now" in these circumstances or this situation.  

If we aren't careful our beautiful, bright world will quickly become dull because of all that wishin' and wonderin'. By all means, dream. Dream of the days, the sweet life and the goals, but let's not miss what is right in front of us right now. 

Lord, remind us that this season of life has purpose. It's special and put here for a reason. May we not get in too big of a hurry that miss the opportunity to stop and enjoy today.

Let's pledge to stand strong, be present and take it all in during this season of life because the next one will be here before we know it!

xoxo

Jes

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” Matthew‬ ‭6:34‬ ‭(NLT)‬‬ 

“Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah‬ ‭40:28-31‬ ‭(NLT‬‬)

Dear Change, We Don't Always Love You.

Why is change so hard?

May I let that question sit with you for a minute? Tomorrow I’ll have the opportunity to speak to a group of women at the Leadership Education Seminar. My topic is “Turnover & Transition” an eloquent title defined by change as we ask, “How do we lead through the change?”.  

Change is all around us. It’s in our personal life, a new season of life, at home or in the workplace, it’s in our relationships and community; it’s happening. Kids are taking their first steps, friends moving into new homes, graduates are starting college, parents are aging and friends are getting married and/or having babies. As I’ve heard them say in the South, “we’re all in the thick of it together.”

Whether it’s anticipated or unexpected, it’s the new. And we make the choice to either embrace it or resist it. What will you do? What’s changing in your life? What do you wish you could or could not change?

Most of the time my head screams embrace it, but my heart whispers wait, don’t. Other times, I can’t wait for things to change. (I’ll talk more about living in the “wait” in my next post.) Regardless of how the change comes, I’m praying that we’ll have the courage to welcome it. We want to be compassionate about the new, lean into the growth and opportunity with a smile and continue to remember that each season has a reason and a purpose.

Welcome, my friend. Change and new adventure awaits. What will you chose to do with it?

xoxo
Jes

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

If we're in a season of change, may we simply readjust our sails.  

Highlights & Real Life

Why do I keep comparing your highlight reel to my behind-the-scenes real life?  

I love seeing your pictures. I love the vacations pics, the killer workouts and progression, the smiling kiddos, the beautiful beach pictures, perfectly made dinners on the table and your best selfies. I love seeing all of your adventures too. 

But here's what I'm sometimes missing - those are only your highlights. Those are the moments you and I choose to share with the world on social media. They are a part of the story, not necessarily the entire story.  If I know there's more to my story than what I'm sharing with you (and I'm sure it's the same with yours!) then why do we compare others' highlights to our behind-the-scenes real life?

Why do I keep doing it? I think it's the same reason everyone back then was keeping up with the Joneses. Who are the Joneses in the first place? And why are we struggling and sacrificing to keep up with people we don't even really know?  

Within a few minutes of scrolling through my Instagram or FB feed, I'm inadvertently making a presumption on what I think your real life is like and assuming that I need what you have to make mine better. Isn't that where the trouble begins?

I start to lose perspective on the blessings that God has given me. All of a sudden the things that have been entrusted to me get a second rate. They are no longer as great as they were and now need to be upgraded at my (or someone else's!) expense.  

Here's what I'm learning in the midst of living my real-time, behind-the-scenes life: 

1) Comparision is the thief of all joy. It takes away our contentment with who/what we have. The fastest way to flip a feeling of blessing upside down is to look around and realize what you don't have. Don't do it. Take time to be grateful for your life, your people, and your things. As often times, you and I are doing and giving our best with what we have. Let's make time to write down our blessings. It can begin as simple as thanking God for the Keurig coffee pot, the cute ceramic Starbucks mug and the hot coffee to get your day started. Start small. Try it! When we're grateful, it changes our perspective to focus on the One who provides the blessings and makes life a lot more fun! 

2) What we display on social media isn't always the full story. I wish it was, but it's not. Let's be honest. Do you share every detail of your life? Of course not and we wouldn't want you to! The last two of my three vacations were interrupted with crisis. Did I share that? No, I posted the best picture of the beach to remind me how great life truly is. And it is! But it's also so stinkin' challenging too. Keep in mind that we're giving and sharing a little snapshot of our lives and don't always get to see or post the entire story line and pictures. 

3) If we begin to want her best, we also have to take her worst. When we begin to want someone else's best (their highlights!), we have to be ready to take on their worst. We can't have one without the other. I had a friend jokingly say, "I wish I was you!" as she knows better. Yes, life is a lot of fun right now, but it hasn't come without loss, costs, challenges and sacrifice.

Keep that in mind as everyone has a full story! Social media isn't real life. It's only a small reflection of our lives as "real life" is meant to be done with your people - yes, the ones right in front of you.

If you find yourself stuck in someone else highlights, take time to get to know them. Ask, meet, and do life with them to find out the rest of the story as you may be surprised! 

Please don't stop sharing your photos! Please post them, tag me and let me "like" them with a grateful and compassionate heart for you! 

Thinking of your highlight reel, what's one piece of advice you'd give to those on the outside looking in?

xoxo
Jes

P.S. See that picture above? Highlight scene: Punta Cana vacation in the Dominican Republic Memorial Day weekend 2016. Real life scene: Celebrating my Dad's birthday, my youngest brother's birthday, and giving a eulogy at my childhood bestie's funeral all in the same week to then catch a flight to the DR for a wedding.What a real and crazy week of my life!

"Yet true godliness with contentment is itself great gain. After all, we brought nothing with us when we came into the world, and we can’t take anything with us when we leave. Be sure to guard what God has entrusted to you." 1 Timothy 6:6-7,20a

"Love must be sincere. Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other genuinely and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality." Romans 12:9-13

Be Present: Right here, Right now.

"Did you see that?” I asked the girl sitting next to me. We were in the stands of one of Major League Baseball’s biggest games of the year and she was missing it!

This game featured the best of the best - players who had set records, beat records and made modern-day history. They hit homers out of the park and threw fastballs over ninety-eight miles an hour, yet all around me, sat fans who were missing the moment. They there for the game, but weren't present for the moment.

Modern-day technology and social media has revolutionized the way we communicate and now share information, but it's also caused a slow, lingering second effect where we are sometimes more caught up in capturing the moment instead of being in the moment and it’s causing us to miss what’s happening right in front of us. 

God never intended for us to miss out on this life. He created us with five senses, emotional intelligence and the ability to experience life firsthand through the lens of our eyes and our hearts. The Bible reminds us in Psalm 90:1 "Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts." We gain wisdom by remembering our life on this earth has purpose, but is short and temporary. Jesus came so that we may have life and experience it to the fullest through his free gift of grace and salvation.

I’m not asking to you to stop snapping pictures or taking videos from now on. Our technology tools are valuable in helping us tell our story and mark moments of history. However, I am asking for you to give a second thought to pulling out your technology device to capture everything - because when the lens of our camera captures everything, the lens of heart sometimes miss things.

We only get to live life once. We. get. this. moment. once. We don't get to rewind or redo the stories of our lives, so I encourage you to take time to set down your phone to watch your little one take those next couple of steps or turn off the TV and sit around the dinner table with your people, watch the ball game without the camera live or enjoy a good cup of coffee with a friend without first “checking in” and simply be in the moment.

May we be people who are wise in our hearts and live life in the present.

xoxo

Jes

“Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are short." Ephesians‬ ‭5:15-16

My guy and I excited for the MLB All-Star Game

#SmallisBigChallenge

Over the past couple weeks, I've been writing and posting from the Heart Magazine #SmallisBigChallenge. Each day is associated with a word and a challenge to find grace, love and appreciation in the smallest.  

I've loved it! It's made me take time out of my day to think about and reflect on the littles (and bigs!) of my life. It's also encouraged me to write more and share my story via social media and the magazine's #ShareYourHeart campaign. (You can find my entires on Instagram at @jdelinde and the Heart Magazine's original post here.) 

@theheartmag #SmallisBigChallenge Day 15: Treat. 

Today's biggest treat is that my Dad turned sixty! My brothers and I are thrilled about being home to celebrate his birthday. He is the coolest dude and the best Dad a girl could ask for! After a tough year, celebrating is something that we love to do even more. We've each learned that life together is a gift.

I've also had the treat of having some amazing girlfriends in my life. These girls (pictured below) along with my cousin, Sarah Nicole have done a lot of life together since we were kids. From elementary school through college and soon into our thirties, we have lived full lives. From junior high cheerleading, Spring Lake church camp, first loves, bad break-ups and teenage independence, to degrees, careers, cross-country moves, many girls nights out, weddings and motherhood; even family heartache, disappointment and divorce--we have seen God's sweet bond of friendship continue to weave stories and memories in our lives.

Tara, Victoria, Rachel, Dad, me and Amber in May 2006. *See this post to fill you in on my little white dress.

Tuesday evening, we received terrible and unexpected news that our childhood friend, Tara had passed away leaving behind three sweet kids and a best friend for a husband. Words are beyond the tender heartache of the last few days as tears can only speak of life's goodness and pain all same. 

Ironically that morning, I had publicly posted that through God's loving grace and mercy, I could still smile after hurt and heartache.

Three days later and in a much different heart condition, I still hold onto that promise because of this simple truth: "I believe heaven is for real. I know the Hope of heaven and the promise of Jesus Christ will heal and that God is still near."

To only share the bright smiles and happy highlights, I'd be missing out on the rest of the truth that makes it my story. Life is made up of the goods and bads, the highs and lows; success and failure, joy and pain, love and hurt. 

But I also believe life is truly fueled by love and hope and faith. I believe God's plans are so much bigger than we can imagine and that each of our lives have a greater purpose than we know.

I am so grateful for my girlfriends--those in Arkansas, California and across the country--that I get to love, laugh and "do" life with. Whether it's every day or on occasion, over text, FaceTime or phone calls, these are God's gifts; and at the end of my time, I want to have loved my friends, family and those around me freely and fiercely.

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." -Alfred Lord Tennyson

Keep us all in your prayers!  

I love y'all to the moon and back.

xoxo

Jes

“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.” Romans‬ ‭8:37-38‬